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Learning How to Flirt


A way to meet potential mates, flirting is the first step in opening the door to a romantic relationship. Flirting is a necessary skill for both men and women, but learning how to flirt can seem intimidating. Just keep in mind that at its most basic, flirting is just being friendly with someone whom you find attractive.

A critical aspect of flirting is acting relaxed and natural when making an approach. Don't act like you are trying to over analyze the situation or have a deeper motive. A good trick is to act like you are talking with an old friend, even though you have just met.

Making eye contact while taking shows sincerity. As most people shy away from it, making eye contact will set you apart from the crowd.


Pay attention to what she is saying and use it to keep the conversation going. Light-hearted teasing will show her you aren't too serious while also demonstrating you have a sense of humor.

Take a risk and take charge, in a nonthreatening way. For example, after taking for a while, don't just ask for a dance, but take her by the hand and say, "I've decided I want you to dance with me" while leading her on the dance floor.

Focus not so much on what you say, but how you say it. Speak in a relaxed and laid-back manner while maintaining a passionate and outgoing attitude.

Keep your expectations low at first, so as not to come across overly aggressive, and possible desperate and needy.
How to Flirt

Don't use cliche pickup lines. When learning how to flirt, believe in yourself and that you have the ability to melt her heat with just a look and your smile; remember, the best pickup line ever invented is just a simple "hi."

Watch her body language. If her feet are pointing towards you, she's flipping her hair or touching you on the arm she is interested. Initiate casual touching to see how she responds. If she pulls away or tenses up you need to back off a little. If she relaxes you are making progress.

Intentionally misinterpret things she says to gauge her response. If she makes an effort to explain herself it can turn the tables so it seems like she is trying to pick you up.

Most girls won't bite your head off if you try to talk to them. In fact, most girls will admit they wish that guys would talk more.

Get her to make the first move. Relax, smile, make eye contact and look away. If she hasn't made a move after the third attempt she probable isn't going to, so approach her or pick another girl.


Don't make the first date a long, drawn out and expensive affair. Keep it short, such as just drinks or maybe lunch, and keep the conversation casual without treating the date like an interview.

Don't become clingy or act like you want to get too serious right away. Allow her to learn she can be comfortable with you.

Don't become predictable or too available and her desire for you will grow; women always seem to want what they can have.

Maintain a life separate from your dates with her, allowing you to retain an air of mystery.

Move on if things don't go well, even if you are still interested in her. Letting her see she isn't irreplaceable might make her come back. If not, now that you know how to flirt, you can find some else.